August Remix

Thank you, Susannah Conway.  I do believe your August Break gave me my voice back.  When the month began I couldn’t think, let alone write.  My life had been on hold for nearly a year, all writing projects abandoned after my mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer.  Between her myriad of doctor’s appointments and her subsequent move from her home into mine, I was pretty much operating on autopilot, and after awhile just felt numb.  When my mother moved back home in mid-July after taking a turn for the better you’d think I would have jumped right back into my own life, except for the fact that I was mentally and physically exhausted.  August Break gave me permission to re-center myself.  I loved that there were no rules. The opportunity to be more fully present each day was a blessing, and I knew there was a possibility that I could actually learn something about myself in the process.  This morning, on this final day of the month, I decided to take a closer look at all the posts I had given a title.  I then wrote each title on a yellow sticky note and arranged them randomly on my kitchen table. In the end, it appears that August had a lot to say.

On 1 August 2011, at dawn’s First Light, I rolled over in my bed, looked up at the ceiling and thought, Finally…August Break! Come on in, the Door’s Open!  I had High Hopes as the month got underway, looking to shake a bad case of writer’s laryngitis that had taken hold at about the same time I had launched Le blog de Marie.  I should have known that after months and months of craziness I would be left feeling Speechless.   But what really surprised me as the Dog Days of summer got underway was how utterly and completely Lost I felt.  It’s not that I wasn’t Feeling the Love from my husband and daughter.  They were both amazing.  But in order for me to be amazing too, I knew I would have to do some serious self-work.  The Writing Was On The Wall.  If I wanted this paralyzing state I was in to be Only Temporary, I knew I would need to ingest some serious and substantial Soul Food.  I made time for daily reflection and contemplation.  I began to Tune In to my inner wisdom, shutting out all external noise so I could listen attentively. As this became my regular ritual I started to relax.  I adopted the mantra, Follow the Peace, and let it guide me in every encounter and endeavor. Peace whispered in my ear, there’s No Place Like Home.

As my daughter headed off to college I was reminded of The Circle Game. It whispered that while you can time travel momentarily, you can’t ever really go back again. You’ve got to stay present and embrace every moment. Find direction by focusing on what’s truly important.  It’s the Principles of life that act as our very own internal compass, guiding us through life like faithful friends. As I tapped into my own personal navigation system I realized the principles that I hold dear have always been charting my course.

I believe in the Boomerang Theory…that you get back what you give out.

I believe in being a truth-teller and that honesty is the best policy.

I believe that you must be a person of your word.

I believe that relationships are more important than things.

I believe that you must take responsibility for your actions.

I believe that you must be who you are.

And I believe most of all in the power of love.

Day 13 turned out to be Lucky 13 for me.  That’s the day I realized I didn’t feel frozen anymore.  I recognized fully that He is always Kissing the Ground We Walk On and that we are never ever alone. I experienced firsthand the power and positive energy we can create when we become Keepers of the Light, a light that radiates from The Seat of the Soul and allows us to shine Brighter Than The Moon.

As August bows to September, I will Exfoliate the dead self in favor of the new and recommit to my life’s path by employing all the necessary Rules of Engagement.  I will remember that you must never quit because It’s Not Over Till It’s Over.  Every Picture Tells A Story, indeed.

2 comments

  1. Genius way to illustrate the journey that was your August Break. May you continue to evolve as a person, writer, and artist going forward.

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